Valtimore B. Fenis, Mindanao - Can I share something?

I have been attending the training of trainers on gender-sensitive active non violence for men. I believe that a gender sensitive active non violent man has the courage and positive power to work for gender justice in this world. A man, who is ready to take on this role is a man who is able and willing to listen to and understand issues and concerns in this world and to reflect on these and himself in a critical manner. Such a man does not part the personal from the political, because the personal life and life itself is political!

I am not just talking about putting forward women’s rights, but about internalizing the very principle of wholeness; whatever a man does, it will have an effect on his society and the people in this society; other men, women, gays, bisexuals, transgender, lesbians etc. This holistic way of seeing the world is essential when conveying and spreading the message of acceptance and peaceful co-existence.

I am very thankful for having the privilege to be part of this Training of Trainers organized by IFOR-Women Peacemakers Program. It is a fantastic and very enriching experience for me. I am making connections with men from all over the world and I can feel the comradeship among the trainees and the facilitators. It is a very wonderful thing that IFOR-WPP did. It is a gift to humankind and the world.

The exchanges with the participants, coming from 17 different countries, all with their own rich experiences and passions for peacebuilding, give me more courage and energy in facing all the possible hindrances in working with men and women in my home country. I will work with them on gender issues and explain them how socialization processes work, to encourage them to step ‘out of the box of this social construction’ and to act and do things in a different, positive and constructive way. It will not be an easy task, but doing nothing will definitely not making any changes.

I feel there is a concrete necessity for men and women to work hand in hand to free ourselves of ‘these boxes of thinking and conforming to it’. The only ones who are capable to liberate these men and women are the men and women themselves.

I am very thankful that I have learned so many different approaches and perspectives on active non violence and gender sensitivity. I will reflect on and digest these issues more when I am back in my own home context. I will share all my experiences and knowledge there. This training, this field of gender sensitive active non violence, is very important for my work in social justice.

It’s challenging work and it will be, since we are the ones challenging ourselves and overall systems that have dominated the society for a long time. The learning in this training, the provision of space for everyone to talk and share, the feeling of connection with all, and the sharing of emotions among each other has really enriched and empowered my life.

I am hopeful that men, women and all genders can work together and build an alternative society favorable for everybody. Along the way while working for an alternative society marginalization, oppression, exploitation, repressions, suppression and discrimination must be destroyed and converted into positive actions and attitudes.

I am Valtimore Borjel Fenis, I am a hopeful, sinful man, hungry for more learning and more experiences. I will bring back all I learned and reflect on how it can be used in my own context.

I believe I am not alone in this work. I know I am working together with men, women and all genders from all over the world, with all colors, races, religions, and classes in a mission to transform the world.

Ever onward comrades and please keep me posted on your work!